So, I have 5 days until retirement! I have received many emails and PMs from so many of you and want to say thank you! This blog began in 2006...wow. So, I have shared many good and bad experiences on this blog and have had my ups and downs. I have tended to hide behind "Sarahsmiles" so I suppose I'll start a personal journal..but no one to share it with....
Well, I am looking forward and guess it just took me this long to really be ready to make the changes. I spent some time with my family last month and it was wonderful. I hadn't seen my mom and brother in two years or so. I was even humbled and actually rode the bus to Dallas...I wouldn't have even considered that at one point in my life. Although I tried to hand my ticket to the guy for my bags...and asked the guy next to me to plug in my cell phone charger (no outlets apparently)...and spilled my fountain drink while "resting my eyes"....it was an interesting experience. I did learn while waiting for the bus at the Dallas downtown station that it's not like an airport and you just "check your bags" but that you actually have to carry your own and watch them until you get to the bus itself. I also learned that people come out of nowhere with these really sad stories when you flash cash. I was simply trying to give my mom some money and we had the usual "No, I can't take that" and "Mom, I'll just put it in your purse" and "No, keep it for yourself" and then my final reply that ALWAYS wins, "Okay, I'll just buy some ***** with it".... Anyway, apparently "Susan" was just out of jail and trying to get back to somewhere. So, my mom told her to stay out of trouble...it was cute...okay, Mom, now I know where I get my naivety.
My boyfriend and I have been thru so much over the last year and a half but really want to get our shit together. He has been "forced" to change some of his habits, and I am willing to do anything to better myself as well as anything for him (and us).
So, he can't deal with my "job" anymore, and I'm not going to ask him to do so. I have never been able to trust someone else to take care of me and honestly have no reason whatsoever to believe that he will, based on our history. But, I believe he wants to...that he will do his best...and that's really all I can ask of him. I have a part to play as well. The best part is that I have decided to stop dwelling on the "what ifs" and just take the plunge. I always land on my feet and will do the same wherever I may land next! I'm a happy camper! ;)
Sarah
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